This month we are excited by the number of words, Bob and Bonnie Jones included (http://www.bobjones.org/Docs/Words%20of%202012/2012-02_StopLookListen.htm)
encouraging us as the Body of Christ to stop and listen to what the Holy Spirit is saying to us in this season,
as well as seeing and then decreeing all that He wants to do!
We know that this word from Katie Wiedrick, a Director and dear friend to us all, will be life to you and an encouragement to get everything out of the way that would prevent us from seeing His beauty and His blessings and the wonder future He has planned and purposed for us all!
Time went on and driving became increasingly problematic, I would have to slow down on the Highway as I could not judge distance, I would have to pass exits and come back at them, as I could only see signs once I was upon them. Driving at night became very stressful as light became halos and rain added to night driving was downright miserable.
Walking even was hard. The moon had a glare on it, street lamps and Christmas lights blurred together. I could not see well at all, walking slowed and I found myself looking down more and more. Not being able to see left me feeling as if my world was getting smaller by degrees. I saw a very interesting documentary in December of this past year. I talked of how seniors, when they become frightened of falling, look down to the ground more and more. The difficulty that posses is that what you focus on, you are drawn toward. The brain focuses on the ground and those folk fall even more readily. The brain needs to be re-trained by looking forward. I practiced that all the while, feeling increasingly nervous, walking had lost a fair bit of its luster yet I persevered.
And I did. Early this past January I made my way to an Opthalmologist and there, he saw what I could not grasp. Both eyes affected, one so large and thick, he told me there was a chance it might take two surgeries to remove it. As he was very concerned about me driving, he booked surgery on a cancellation list and on February 13, he did the eye with the largest cataract. By that night, I could see so much more. Details, color, distance and I had not even gone outside yet. The next morning on my walk, I felt that someone had cleaned all my windows. Even now, every day I am experiencing some new wonder. I have walked this area of our town for a year, now I am truly seeing it with new eyes. I can see! I nearly cried when I thanked the surgeon at my post-operative appointment. The right eye is being done next Thursday, he told me he can hardly wait for that. Interesting he said to me the cataract was so thick and so brittle, he had to crack it and take it off it 4 pieces.
You are all so astute, you don’t need me pointing out to you all of the spiritual lessons in this experience. I do though feel it has merit, this process for me and for that reason I am sharing it with you. Vision is critical for our well being spirit, soul and body. I know now the angst of not being able to see as I once did, the sense of losing something so valuable, yet assigning the loss to sin. Waiting for healing, contending yet passively accepting limitations without getting help or sharing the reality of the struggle. The limits to seeing down the road, having to slow everything down to navigate life safely and the un-ease in making decisions, all affected by this.
Abigail our daughter needed a ride home from the Toronto Airport a few nights ago. I left to get her in the dark, in a drizzle. What relief it was to be able to see and with a much smaller halo. The same girl had commented a few months ago, when I had done the same journey on what a pokey driver I had become. As we drove home together Wednesday night, I commented on my speed and ease. She smiled and said that I had always been such a good driver in the past and how it had changed, now I am back. She laughed and said, “look at you in the fast lane now”.
From the fast lane, with love